What Is Meant by the Concept of Love?
- Erik Wessley | FIGU USA INC
- Mar 20
- 6 min read
Updated: Mar 21
What Is Meant by the Concept of Love?
This is a difficult question, because there is no answer that is completely clear and could be described as universally valid, because every human being, female or male, defines love individually according to their understanding, their sensations, their thoughts and the feelings and behaviours that arise from them. Basically, however, feelings of love give rise to feelings of attachment, which can be to a human being, but also to animals, creatures, other life-forms of the entire fauna and flora or to objects. Consequently, love is to be defined in a different way in this respect.
However, it is not my intention to do so, because the question "What is love?" refers, as I understand it, solely to love from human being to human being or to love between human beings, and there are different phases. So what does love mean in this relationship? It is not enough to simply describe it as a 'strong feeling of attraction', as is explained in so-called reference books, because love in human beings must be defined according to what it is effectively like. It is therefore not enough to have a strong feeling of affection for a human being, because if real, true love actually exists, then there is an effectively profound bond that is fundamentally based on the power of creative energy and is not simply physical, but effectively indestructible. This form of true and genuine love is the one that overcomes and survives what-ever may also come.
Love Relationships have Different Phases
Relationships in love are often exciting and quickly lead to break-ups, because many human beings who 'fall in love' quickly drift apart again before even close or fleeting initial contact takes place. This is especially the case when they realise that their own or their partner's thoughts, and therefore also their feelings, are mistaken. Or you suddenly realise that your own or your partner's characteristics are disturbing and cannot be borne responsibly. It may also be that infatuation is missing, or that physical contact does not correspond to what is expected, or that the sex life does not meet expectations, or that jealousy makes it impossible to continue the relationship, so that true love can never develop.
So understanding and reason and thought are required to think about a separation, or 'perhaps' an attempt should be made to tackle and overcome the problems that arise, but this is usually a false and failing labour of love and is not to be counselled. True and sincere love, it can be said with a very good conscience, only begins when human beings really find each other honestly and grow together, when they can compromise with each other and also accept each other in love when things do not go according to plan, but there is no arguing.
If this is really the case, then it is absolutely given and normal that there is no doubt about the love and honesty of the other partner and that everything is maintained as it is correct, regardless of whether it is a marriage or a free partnership. And this is the case when the correct partnership for life is really found and that there is never any talk of 'breaking up'. That is why such a relationship never ends with a 'break-up'.
Crises in Relationships
Crises in relationships can only occur if there is no real, true love, but rather a form of love that harbours some kind of crisis moments in various forms that have such a disruptive effect on the relationship that it is disturbed and questioned and a separation is considered. Human beings who do not have to endure such moments because they are given real and honest love can rely very confidently on their stable partnership, because they can rely on each other in all the ups and downs of life, and they know at all times how to deal with each other and how to overcome any problems together. However, human beings who have relationship problems do not know their partner's quirks, so they also do not know how to deal with them.
Consequently, it is not possible to speak of real and true love in such a relationship during a crisis, because only in an effectively trusting and honest partnership do open and clear thoughts and feelings provide complete security that really gives stability in every situation.
Being in love
True love is not being in love, because there is a huge difference in this respect, which can be recognised in the fact that thoughts are overridden and are constantly preoccupied with the situation of being excited, focused on the human being who is 'adored' and desired. As a result, the thoughts affect the functioning of the body and cause its organs to orientate and react to them, causing them to release more of the so-called happiness hormones, dopamine, which constantly promotes the feelings of being in love that are generated by the thoughts.
This creates a state that can last for varying lengths of time, even months or years. However, if the feeling of being in love continues unabated over a longer period of time, then love can develop from this in a wise way that creates a mental and emotional bond, from which a feeling of togetherness can develop, which, through renewed impulses, causes the emergence of the cuddling hormone oxytocin, a neurotransmitter produced in the brain that has an anxiety-dissolving and also bond-strengthening effect, which then leads to a state of familiarity and everydayness and the whole infatuation dissolves and gives way to a state of everyday life.
Love Is to Be Cherished and Nurtured
Real, true, genuine love can never be taken for granted and as such is to be cherished and nurtured just as seriously as any other form of love that is to endure. Genuine, true love in particular requires constant attention, where-by many aspects must be taken into account and applied, but which are cherished and cultivated in genuine and true love as an absolute and clear matter of course, e.g. creative-energetic concentration, respect, accommodation, consideration, gratitude, interest, compassion, support, understanding, freedom, peacefulness, cognitive sympathy, respect, appreciation, honour, joy, kindness, willingness, offering and wish fulfilment, etc.
These high values are inherent in genuine, true love and are therefore cherished and cultivated, but unfortunately they are lacking in those human beings who pursue relationships other than genuine, true love because they are full of trouble or hardship, so they are only partially, sufficiently, satisfactorily,
reasonably, halfway right, reasonably well or really well.
How good relationships between human beings are formed, regardless of whether they are of a friendly, companionable or simply acquaintance nature, but especially those that exist in a form of love, there is a way to cultivate that truly corresponds to a wise love that should also be maintained; consequently, an effort of more intensive care is given. It should therefore not be done carelessly or negligently, quite the opposite, for such a relationship is to be constantly worked on, for the love that arises from it or is already budding or already existing has to be cultivated.
It is therefore necessary for human beings to surprise each other from time to time, for example by creating and doing new things, practising new things or otherwise inventing new things in order to make things better, to make a better impression or to shape a better future for the partnership, and so on. Human beings in close and long-term relationships are dependent on maintaining their individual freedoms and not making themselves mutually or unilaterally dependent on the other partner.
The human being is an independent individual who has very personal interests and needs that everyone wants to have respected. This also applies to the very important aspect of self-love, as this determines whether a human being respects themselves and forms themselves correctly as a true human being and accepts themselves as such. Only if they are able to accept themselves and develop a valuable and healthy self-confidence and have it really firmly installed in themselves can this also be transferred to their partnership and act as a very important factor of trust in the partnership.
It is also very important to be communicative in the wise manner of always exchanging the relevant thoughts and feelings with the other and beloved human being, as well as to talk together about one's own, the other's or the common interests, wishes and needs, etc., as well as always maintaining respect for the other, because this is particularly important for each other, because respect is always and inevitably the key to respect for peace and long-lasting love in creative-energetic affection and also unanimous physical connectedness.
by "Billy' Eduard Albert Meier
August 14th 2021
ORIGINAL GERMAN SOURCE: Warum der Mensch das wird, was er ist und Kampf den Depressionen
This is an authorized translation of a FIGU publication. This translation contains errors due to the insurmountable language differences between German and English. The British-English language has been specifically elected by the Plejaren as being the most suitable English language variation for the translation of all German FIGU publications.
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